The Grass Is Greener!

While I am sure, most everybody has heard the “cliche ” The grass ain’t necessarily greener on the other side” the one saying has probably never been, on the other side. Now the question is, on the other side of what? I would say the other side of your dilemma, problem or the reasons why you’re looking to the other side. I won’t get into the origin of this well-known cliche, but it has it origin in the fact of not being satisfied with your own lawn, thinking your neighbors looks much better.

In this, I’m referencing relationships, mainly marriage, my previous marriage. Its been more than four years now, probably five since that liberating day. I still know, it was the best decision I made because my grass was withered and had brown patched. That would be my cliche of “troubled” Men, we hear of the many horror stories of being raked, robbed and left for broke during and decades after a lengthy divorce. We also listen to and believed things like, “it’s cheaper to keep her”. Seldom do we hear from the men who managed to eject, egress or escape the gravitational pull of their demise in a divorce. While many will stay “for the sake of the kids” of ‘to avoid the big payout” there are those of us who experienced the immediate gratifying results of a proper weight gain because we can rest at night and have a healthy appetite.

When I Had Enough!

During my marriage, I was severely underweight, the stress was causing me to wither away, and I didn’t realize it until I left and my health improved. And all of those years, my X didn’t care one bit! I was depressed and didn’t know if I was coming, going, or I’ve already left. I didn’t have the courage to leaf; the fear of the unknown kept me in a marriage of convenience. Convenient for her. What was mine was hers, and what was hers, belonged to her, and she lived it in comfort with the ability to sleep well at night for many years. I won’t go into much detail, because this would be a lengthy blog post to wright. But if you, my readers would like to ask some questions, I’d be happy to respond.

It took me sometime, but when I finally had enough and wanted better for myself, I followed through with the declaration, I made five months before I departed. It was during the new year of 2013, I declared and informed my then wife, the first opportunity I get, I am leaving you! I was willing to face the fears that I had of the unknown. Sure, Ive had my sad days, then my bad days, but the good things that began to happen in my life, far outweighed the years of emotional drama, deceit and lies that I had to endure.

Seeing Is Believing

The love that I had for my wife, was definitely blinding if there was one of the many things that I learned, it was this: “Never Be So In Love, That You Dismiss, Over Look or Trivialize the Obvious This That Is Blatantly Not Right!” What on earth am I talking about? OK, I’ll break it down, the small lie, when she left for work as is dressed like she’s going on a date! she gets sick at work and a male co-worker drives her to the hospital! and finally, most of your bills are late or in collections, when you bring home and give her your check to pay for everything! Seeing it should cause you to believe it! When she some time says it, you’d best believe it too, especially when those shady actions matched her shady conversation.

Getting counseling in the church was practically the worst thing that could happen to me. I was the man, who needed to be submissive to my wife! I felt like I was Alice living in wonderland! When I finally made my departure, my health improved, I had peace of mind, my finances were better than they were in the 25+ years of marriage and I slept like a baby! It took time, but I made it through and then I realized The Grass Is Greener, on this side!

Going Against The Grain

Please follow and like us: