Sometimes it is Great!
Yes, I know its a quote from Genisis 2:10 “Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone…”. I think that no one person should have to be alone. But when I fast forward to the 21st century, there are many benefits in some alone time. When I take into account past experiences, sometimes I find peace in being alone.
There is no stress; I don’t have to account for every breath I take or face a cross-examination for someone who is insecure. What do you want for dinner? Why aren’t you hungry? What time will you be home from work? ( At the end of the day!) What are we doing this weekend (Really…It’s Monday Woman!) All I can think of when I hear so many questions is“where do I turn this off!”
Spending time with someone you love is relaxing, and its a joy along with the many other pleasantries that come with a happy union. What is it that happened to couples over the years? I realize no one word or sentence can answer the question, but something has changed in recent years. Social media is a supplement to communication and intimacy. We meet, greet and bond by way of smartphone and then by surrounding ourselves in crowds of people. Seldom do we socialize and when we do, eye contact is at a minimum or non-existent when walking past someone in public.
For Better Or Worse…yeah right!
The word love is on loan from something vaguely remembered from a distant past or plagiarized from some old romance novel. As long as you’re lovable and in good health and have a great job, you’re “conditionally” loved, by someone who thinks your a great catch. We love until sickness appears, we look for the exit when “for worse” comes along and when “for better” never shows, we are no longer in love. We use the same word love, to describe how we feel about shoes or a car to express how we or what we think about a person.
What seems to be genuinely desired by some women is control and the try to package it in a wrapper called love. Sometimes, I can see the value of being alone. I’m more productive, restful and not on edge. I can think freely without having to give an immediate answer, and I can change my mind without having to explain in detail my decision. Okay, maybe I’ve been in the wrong relationships, that’s ok, I’ve learned. Peace, quiet and not having to endure the cross-examination of a significant other are priceless.
Without a doubt, alone time is necessary to restore one’s sanity when you have nothing but chaos in your relationship (T. Allen 2018). So, I like my alone time and the silence that comes with it, but too much silence or quiet can be just as unnerving like the sound of dinner forks hitting teeth during a meal. We say we communicate, but we say nothing, we say we’re content, but our faces don’t show it, we say we are happy, but happiness is an illusion.
It may not be a good thing for a man to be alone, it’s even worse when he is with someone, and still, he is yet alone. Embrace the freedom to live life on your terms, with no collar attached (marriage/committed relationship) Life is Good, on my own. I’m Just Saying!
Going Against The Grain